


I Love You, Now and Forever.

by Itch



Series: Sabriel One Shots [12]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, M/M, oh h h the angst, suicide TW
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-12
Updated: 2015-10-12
Packaged: 2018-04-25 23:46:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 717
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4981462
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Itch/pseuds/Itch
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Gabriel is having a very hard time.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Love You, Now and Forever.

Gabriel stared down at his phone. It was silent. It had been for days. He unlocked it, 0205, and went to his texts, scrolling through the countless unread messages to the only conversation he wanted to read. Only one conversation he needed to read, only one conversation mattered anymore.

 

_> I love you_

_I love you too <_

 

The breeze tickled his face and he swept a hand through his hair, pushing it away from his face as he sat, the rain sweeping through his jeans, through the shirt he was wearing, making him cold to the bone. He tugged at the sleeve of the plaid shirt he was wearing. It wasn’t even his. He gritted his teeth, standing up and staring at the sky, the inky blackness above him with a weak smattering of stars blinking at him like ever watchful eyes. He headed to a bar. Somewhere small, somewhere sleazy, the kind of place that you expect to see people like him. He sat down, dropping his card on the bar.

 “Double fireball. No ice.” He grunted, having the glass thrust into his hands. “And open a tab.” He slid the card across the bar with two fingers. He drunk the whiskey, putting the glass back down and tapping the bar twice. The barman refilled it. Gabriel pulled a crumpled photograph from his pocket. He looked at the smiling faces in it, before shoving it back in his pocket, drinking the second glass.

 

_> I’m sorry_

_What for? <_

Gabriel was drunk. He stumbled down the road, struggling to put one foot in front of the other without falling over. Tripping over, he landed on his knees in a puddle, and he stared down at his reflection in the rainwater, looking at the sorrowful expression on his face, the week old stubble, the dark bags under his eyes. Putting all his weight on his hands, he pushed himself up and found his way home.

 

_> Everything_

_What do you mean? <_

 

He woke up the next morning with cotton mouth and a headache. He stood up, regretted it, and sat down. What didn’t he regret these days? He looked around the bedroom from the single mattress on the floor. Bare walls, clothes in black bags, piles of photographs in the corner. He crawled to one of these piles, picking up a photo. It was of him, at Christmas, struggling to reach the star on the tree.

Another of him, this time in floral boardshorts at the beach.

Another of him in the snow, grinning.

Another of him in a suit, looking like he’d just seen the most amazing thing in the universe.

His breath hitched and he turned it over, finding neat handwriting. _Our wedding. :)_

__  
  


_> Just know that I love you, okay?_

_I know that. I love you too <_

 

He stared at his own face.The bowtie, the shirt, the small orange flower in his pocket, the look in his eyes. He balled it up, throwing it across the room. He got up, fist flying into the wall, chest heaving. Picking up the photos he threw them all like bad confetti, watching them drift to the floor. He left the room, leaving a trail of destruction, smashing a lamp, knocking over a bookcase, breaking his own hand before he sat in the midst of the chaos and sobbed.

 

_Sam? <_

_You coming home late again? <_

_Dinner’s in the microwave, sorry I made it so early, got an early start tomorrow <_

_Sam why didn’t you come home? <_

_{missed call}_

_Sam, pick up the phone <_

_{missed call}_

_SAM. <_

 

 “I’m sorry.” Gabriel choked out through sobs, clutching the photo from his pocket to his chest, rocking backwards and forwards. “I shoulda… I shoulda noticed… how did I not notice…” he sobbed, closing in on himself.

 

_“Gabriel Novak?”_

_“Yeah.”_

_“I’m sorry.”_

 

Gabriel stared down at the scrunched paper, thumb tracing Sam’s jawbone, his smile. He grinned weakly remembering them taking the photo the day before their wedding when they went ice skating.

 “‘m sorry I let you down Samshine.” He whispered to the photo. “I shoulda noticed you were strugglin’”

 

_Hey Sam, I know what happened now <_

_The police were really nice about it <_

_I’m sorry Samshine <_

_I should have noticed, I shouldn’t have made you suffer through that alone <_

_I love you. Now and forever <_

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> i apologise for this it hurt a lot to write and i cried real tears so y e a h 
> 
> Find me: pumpkinspicegabriel / whodoesntlovesabriel


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